Why I'm Not Crazy About Valentine's Day

[So You Know: I'm generalizing here, when I talk about couples - if you're in a relationship, don't feel like I'm bashing on you. I'm simply generalizing and saying what I see the majority of the time.]

I say it all the time that Valentine's Day is one of my least favorite holidays. Alot of people ask me why I'm not a huge Valentine's Day fan, and it's pretty simple.

I think, if you're with someone you truly care about, you should show them you love them every day you're together, not just one day a year. I mean, I understand that Valentine's Day is special for alot of people, because it's their chance to REALLY show their special person how much they care about them. But, let's be real. I know alot of couples out there who aren't exactly "meant to be together", if you know what I mean. They don't act like a couple alot of the time, and they don't treat each other the way they should. For those of you who've read my note "Something on my heart", I talk alot about how girls should be treated, like princesses. On that, I think alot of guys get off the hook when it comes to treating their girl right. I mean, alot of guys' mentalities that I know is like, "I don't have to tell her how I feel everrryyyy day, she already knows how I feel. That's what Valentine's Day is for." They think they don't have to let their girl know how special they are to them, because that's what a holiday is for. They think as long as they show her how they feel one day a year, in some big romantic gesture, yet ignore her or treat her like just any other girl the rest of the year, that it's okay.

That's not true at all! I mean, from a Christian standpoint, the Bible's pretty clear on this stuff. In 1 John 3:18, it says, "...let us not love in word or talk, but in deed and in truth". That's exactly what I'm talking about right here! Event the Bible says what I'm talking about. We're not supposed to love one another (the Bible's talking about brotherly love, for every one else - I think it can be applied to romantic love as well) by the way we talk or our charming words we say. No, we're supposed to love each other in Deed and in Truth. That means that we SHOW people we love them, not just SAY it. We show them how much they mean to us by the way we treat them, what we do for them, how we spend time with them, not by simple words. Now, obviously, romantic relationships require words, so I'm not bashing talking. I'm simply saying that saying "I love you" isn't enough; we have to show the person we're with how much we love them. And we don't do this on only Valentine's Day, but every day we're together.

We see it all the time: guys rushing into Safeway the night before Valentine's Day to get some chocolates, a bear, some flowers, and a nice card. And we all think to ourselves, "awww, that's so cute". But I always catch myself thinking, "good for him, now hopefully he treats her like that every day, not just today". On Valentine's Day, every guy is the "perfect boyfriend" because that's the part he's supposed to play on that day. But as soon as the day's over, he goes back to exactly how he was the day before. I think that's terrible - in a way, it gives the girl a false sense of hope. She might think to herself how awesome her guy is, how much he loves her, and how special she is. And yet, sure enough, the next day, things go back to normal, as if February 14th never happened. That's the trouble with holidays, in my opinion.

I'm not bashing couples at all, I'm just trying to point out how we should be treating each other. This whole concept doesn't just apply to people in romantic relationships. I think that this idea of SHOWING people how much we love them, every day, is for everybody: friends, family, everybody. I try my hardest to show my friends how much I love them every day, even if it's as simple as a text or IM or call or whatever it is. I know how good it feels to have my friends tell me they care for me, so I try to return the favor. As far as relationships go, whenever I'm in a relationship, I tell the person I'm with how much I care for them, how they special they are to me, on a daily basis. I'm not saying I don't do anything for Valentine's Day, because I totally do. I just make sure that on Valentine's Day, I show the person I'm with how special they are to me, even more so than normal. I spoil them on that day, because to me, that's what the day should be about - spoiling the person you're with, not just buying some chocolates. I've never liked Valentine's Day because it seems to me to be just a way for card companies to get money, or have shaky relationships stay together longer.

I'm not trying to be pessimistic or seem like a downer, because I love what Valentine's Day represents, I just don't agree with how people use it nowadays. I love showing people how much they mean to me, I love showering the person I'm with with gifts to show them how special they are. I love spoiling the person, because everyone deserves that. Everyone deserves to be pampered once in a while, and I think Valentine's Day is a great time to do that. But we have to remember that Valentine's Day shouldn't be the only day we do that. To me, overall, the fact that you're in a relationship should be cherished, and not taken for granted. We need to show whoever we're with how much they mean to us every day, because we never know how much longer we'll be together. And if you're in a relationship, please treat each other the same way you feel about each other. Meaning, the way you feel for that person in your mind and heart? SHOW them that, every day, don't keep it to yourself - tell them you love them, show them you love them. Not just on Valentine's Day.

Once again, I'm trying to sound pessimistic or a love-hater; I'm just saying how I feel, and I hope some of this makes sense to you guys, and that this Valentine's Day will be a great day for you all!

Happy Valentine's Day everybody! Make it a great one! Love y'all! :D

Unyielding Questions (5/2011)

I put on this strong face,
When everyone can see.
But they have no clue
What's going on inside of me.

I can't do it much longer,
Acting like I'm so strong.
All these doubts and questions
Make me feel so wrong.

Who am I to question you?
You made me and created me,
You love me and care for me,
But  I just wish you'd show yourself to me.

Show me where to go, what to do --
Just give me a sign.
I can't do this myself,
I know you're my lifeline.

But with all of these questions,
With all of these doubts,
How can I trust you,
How can I see what this is all about?

I'm overwhelmed by fear,
Weighed down with questions.
Each time I doubt you,
I feel like I fall into sin.

Why can't you show yourself?
Reveal yourself to me!
I'm sick of talking to air,
Begging to something I can't see.

Every night I pray,
But I hear no reply.
Do you even stop and listen,
Or do you just pass on by?

Silent Love (9/2011)

Have you ever been silently in love
With someone you can never have?
So close you can touch her hand,
Yet so far to feel her heart?

Have you ever lived in pretense,
Quietly loving without condition?
A feeling of love that's unknown:
Hiding it, not knowing for how long.

Have you ever fallen so deeply,
Loving the person unconditionally?
So afraid to say what you feel,
Acting normal, keeping things still.

Have you ever been hurt unintentionally,
But put on a smile and pretended to be happy?
Deep inside you're in pain and suffering,
But outside you're jolly and laughing.

Why does holding her hand feel so right?
Your heart smiles every time she's in sight.
Hearing her sweet voice makes your day:
Only she can make you feel that way.

Secrets of My Heart (9/2011)

Why does my heart still hold on to you
At every waking moment, in everything I do?
Why do I have to see your face all day
And if you knew, what would you say?

My heart breaks in two when I see him with you,
And I think to myself, what didn't I do?
I wish I could somehow turn back time
And relive the days when you could've been mine.

I wish no one ever had to know
The feeling of lovesick pain from head to toe,
Like someone rips out your heart and tears it in two
And sit back and watch is all you can do.

In my dreams you say those words I long to hear,
And when I look in your eyes, I know you're sincere.
So I'll see you later when the day is through:
When I'm asleep at night, dreaming of you.

Every Time (9/2011)

Every time I see you,
I want you more and more.
Every time you say "Hi" to me,
My heart begins to soar.

Every time you touch me,
I pinch myself to see if I'm awake.
Every time you look into my eyes,
It's my heart you begin to take.

Every time I see you smile,
I wish that it was at me.
Every time I hear your voice,
I regret that "we" just could not be.

For the truth is . . . he likes you
So I must take the backseat.
He has so much to offer
And I simply cannot compete.

For since we are good friends,
I could never take you away.
So, I will look at you with a tear in my eye,
Hoping for the day . . .

When you'll finally be mine,
And I can hold you by my side,
And my deepest feelings
I'll no longer have to hide.

Change (9/2011)

Can you solve for me a mystery
Of why things have to change,
Why live is so complicated,
Why thing's can't stay the same.

I understand that people grow,
And often grow apart.
But why did it have to be you
When I had given you my heart?

I hold inside my feelings,
Never telling you how I feel.
But I need to tell you somehow
That I know "us" could be real.

You have a special something
I just can't figure out.
But I know that we could work:
That's what love is all about.

I'll keep my feelings to myself,
I just can't let you know
Because of what will happen:
You'll change and then you'll go.

If Only You Had a Clue (9/2011)

You can walk right past me
And you don't see a thing.
I walk by with a smile,
But inside my heart's aching.

And I wanna know
If I mean something to you.
I want you to be able to see
All my feelings are true.

I want you to see me,
But what am I supposed to do?
If you can't, and you won't...
If only you had a clue.

I walk back and forth
Just to see your smiling face;
I see you standing there
And it's you I yearn to embrace.

I can feel your heart beat,
But you're still so far away.
One smile from you
Brightens up even my darkest day.

I want you to see me,
But what can I do?
If you choose not to...
If only you had a clue.